Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Communicating luxuriously

The cheapest Vertu mobile phone starts at Dhs 18,000 and the most expensive Signature Plantinum sells for nearly Dhs 120,000. According to the company, sales of its range of phones in the Middle East "are doing very well" and "the Vertu phone is built to last more than 10 years".

So what is it that is so special about this phone that makes it so pricey?

The sapphire crystal screen is polished by a diamond medium and can only be scratched by a diamond since it is the second hardest material to diamond.

The jewelled, ruby, bearings under each key provide the ultimate click and durability of the key press which has been tested to millions of presses.

How will encrusted precious gems enhance your mobile reception? Will those "jewelled, ruby bearings" lovingly massage my fingers as I click those keys into ectasy? Hardly 'a good deal' for what is essentially a tool you use to communicate with other people at the end of the day, so it is glaringly obvious anyone who buys one is doing so to make a statement. Think of the pickup lines you could use:

"Hey. I've got a work of art in my pants and it comes with rubies and diamonds."

Can you think of any other lines your flash Vertu could impress the ladies with? Answers on a postcard.

4 Comments:

Blogger Keef said...

Vertu are simply helping people who have more money than they know what to do with to spread a little of it around.

This is probably a good thing - it's not a good thing if people hoard their cash mountains under the mattress or in a bank - much better if they spend a bit of it (especially for Vertu!).

10:11 pm GTS  
Blogger samuraisam said...

well a communicator 9500 cost 3000 dhs when it came out, i find that REALLY extreme for a phone, and when my dad got one i found it to be a waste of money. 3000 dhs may be justified by PDA stuff and WIFI access but 20,000$ on a phone that doesnt have that many features and IMHO its a POS is stupid.

My lucky sony ericsson phone, went through the washing machine twice, was left in the sand for 3 days, has been dropped and etc countless times and it didnt actually ever break, i just got a new ericsson, and its started acting up recently, but i think its due to the humidity.

my dad once got one of those old ericssons, that were water proof and dust proof and shock proof, once he got a nokia to replace it, he gave it to me, and i threw it at someone's head once and it didnt break, the rubber on the outside started pealing long before the phone ceased functioning.

I think these vertu phones have a 24 hour chaffeur or some crap on them, or from what i recall at the airport while looking at one.

complete and utter waste of money.

10:36 pm GTS  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Vertu, tinted windows and number plates...what more could the uber-riche want? They still have to connect to Etisalat.

4:37 pm GTS  
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3:46 pm GTS  

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